Reflection

Today I am thinking about how much has changed and remained the same. This includes my personal life, work life and sometimes social life. My personal life is always challenging and a work in progress. I will talk more about that after I share about the work life.

My work life has been an up and down thing. I am very blessed that my work life is currently stable and there is no longer the emotional challenges. I feel respected and appreciated for the first time in a long time. I never needed confirmation or the accolades to know I am doing a good job. Police, Fire and & EMS dispatching is not a career that gives much recognition. I always felt and still do that the reward is knowing I helped those in need, both good and bad situations and that I helped get my patrol officers back to their loved ones after every shift. I did that work for over ten years. It will always be dear to my hear. It's my foundation. I retired my headset back in 2014 to work in the records department. This is a very different area of the law enforcement world. I deal with the aftermath. Both parties of a situation want information and sometimes they are kind and sometimes they are not. Working alongside three other people daily becomes a challenge. The personalities and the attitudes can be a grind of the nerves. After so many years of squabbling and the emotional roller coaster, I am in a really good place. Like I said earlier, there is respect and appreciation for what I bring to the table and the unit. To put it simply, I no longer dread going to work. I just dread waking up, because I am tired lol.

My personal life is good. Hubby is happy. Tawny our dog is happy. I am happy. I am always shy to share more about the ins and outs of my private life. I will elaborate when I get a little comfy with my audience. I am working on loving myself. I have started trying to literally love the skin I am in and love me. I took a step in the right direction this Summer. I wore the bathing suit, granted it was a swimming suite with a built in skirt. But I didn't hide it with a t-shirt. I chose to be comfortable amongst my friends who know me and love me for who I am, that includes my appearance and personality. I chuckle, at that line. I felt extremely relaxed and enjoyed every moment of our vacation on the river. I am wearing the shorts, the sleeveless shirts and dresses, that I would normally shun because I trying to hide myself from the world. Social Media has helped me accept me. My appearance is beautiful, and I need to accept it and own it. I am not always this confident. I have the days where I see the outfit and I can't walk out the door to the outside world. I even bought a full length mirror so I can see the finished outcome and use it to aide in critiquing myself and most likely to talk myself out of the outfit. I am not perfect, especially my perception. Aren't we all works in progress?

#teltschiklikeitis #babysteps